Mike Babcock Won’t Shake Connor Brown’s Dirty, Filthy Meathook, and We Think That’s Great
The handshake remains one of the highest forms of symbolic currency in the world. It has the power to unite, to squash conflicts, to seal deals, to broker peace. Ulysses S. Grant and Robert E. Lee, Richard Nixon and Mao Zedong, Yasser Arafat and Yitzahk Rabin — history is rich with important handshakes, each of them resonating with deep meaning.
But sometimes you’re forced shake hands with some schlub you’d rather not shake hands with. There are several ways to navigate around such a situation. You can inform the other party you’re sick, and don’t want to risk contaminating them. You can feign blindness, and pretend not to see the person’s outstretched hand. You can swallow your pride, force a smile and go through with the formality to avoid awkwardness.
Or, you can take a cue from Mike Babcock and just flat out refuse to shake the damn hand. Watch the Toronto Maple Leafs coach put on a master class in the art of handshake snubbing, in his very own locker room, when winger Connor Brown sticks his grubby meathook towards him.
This clip, taken from a recent episode of The Leaf: Blueprint, is beautiful. Inspiring, even. Notice how Babcock initially goes in for the shake, then immediately reneges on the offer, sans hesitation. Like a gangster. Then, to rub salt in the wound, he gives everyone else a healthy shake, nearly yanking Mitch Marner’s and William Nylander’s shoulders out of their sockets. This, in the parlance of our times, is #savage.
Sure, denying someone a handshake can have disastrous consequences. It breaches the rules of social etiquette, and in a professional setting, can stop a business deal dead in its tracks. If you refuse to shake someone’s hand, says career coach Barbara Pachter in The Essentials of Business Etiquette, “you are cutting yourself off from them.”
But you know what? Good. Sometimes you meet people so reprehensible it’s worth burning bridges with them. Why pretend to like someone you actually think is an oxygen thief? We don’t really know why Babcock gave Brown the cold shoulder — he’s actually been playing quite well this season — but we’re sure he had his reasons. Maybe Brown is a total douche canoe, maybe he’s been slacking on defense, maybe Babcock’s just being a troll. Regardless, you’ve got to respect a man who stands by his convictions. Be more like Babcock. Keep it real.
