February the 14th. We know, this heavily commercialized “holiday” isn’t exactly our bag either. As is customary, you will likely put off shopping for gifts until the last minute because you’ve been clicking “remind me later” on the Valentine’s Day notifications for a while now. Next thing you know, it’s Wednesday night after work and you and eight other guys are all trying to fit through the doorway of a flower shop at once. Trust us, if you leave it late enough, buying a dozen red roses will not be as efficient as Tommy Wiseau makes it seem in The Room.
This year, don’t let that happen to you. Be proactive, be genuine, be thoughtful. Or, you could just read this list of stuff I’ve put together so that you don’t really have to be any of those things. Just make sure you get your orders in nice and early so they ship on time for the big day.
Saint Laurent Anja 105 Escarpin Pump
Valentine’s Day means date night for most couples, and while trying to get a reservation at the perfect restaurant can be very stressful (especially if you’ve left it late), have a bit of fun with the occasion by springing these Anja Pump stiletto heels by Saint Laurent on your girl while she’s picking out her outfit for the night. While she may already have a million pairs of black leather heels, she won’t have a pair quite like these premium pumps. Knowing your significant other’s shoe size will earn you big points, but taking SLs advice in sizing down half a size with these into consideration to get the perfect fit will show that you’ve not lost that charming eye for detail.
Saint Laurent Monogram Passport Case
Luckily, this year bae has you to keep her company on Valentine’s, and she doesn’t have to spend it alone, drinking wine in the bath, listening to Drake’s wistfully sensitive voice. Instead, she can do all of that, but with you. Put on “Hotline Bling” and wait for the 6 God to sing “runnin’ out of pages in your passport.” Then, gift her this beautiful, 100 per cent calf-skin leather passport holder from Saint Laurent. Does anyone really need a passport holder? No. It’s completely unnecessary, but then again, so is Valentine’s Day itself.
Moncler High Neck Sweater
Speaking of “Hotline Bling,” nothing says “I’m scared you’ll leave me” like gifting this Drake-inspired chunky turtleneck sweater by Moncler. Jokes aside, turtlenecks like these are among the coziest of clothes, and there’s no better time of the year than a cold, blustery February to outfit your special someone in something you’ll never want to let go of her in. The form-fitting silhouette and 100 per cent virgin wool composition move this sweater closer towards modern casual than Granny swag on the turtleneck spectrum.
Gentle Monster Big Bully Sunglasses
We can only hope by the time February 14th rolls through, we’ll be seeing more of the sun out. These Gold & Silver Big Bully sunglasses by SSENSE won’t directly let you see more of the actual sun, even if you are Donald Trump, but the 100% UV protection they boast will get you about as close as you can to looking at that big flamer. A fresh pair of shades is always a really nice spring treat, too, as sunglasses tend to get lost or go out of style over the course of the long, dark winter. Be careful though, this could turn into an expensive Valentine’s Day tradition for you.
Major bonus points: throw in a pair of plane tickets to somewhere warm in the envelope attached to these glasses and write something like “these will look great where we’re going.” (Sorry, I should’ve saved the word “expensive” for down here.)
Rimowa Salsa Air Multiwheel
If you do plan on being Mr. Next Level and want to treat you and your significant other to a V-Day holiday away somewhere, you could go the whole nine yards and pick up this super lightweight and stylish polycarbonate piece of luxury luggage by Rimowa. The tasteful guards red colour will ensure you spot your case as soon as it falls out onto the baggage carousel, while the TSA-approved lock will keep your matching red knickers from falling out onto the carousel as well.
Hugo Boss Leather Shopper Tote
Perhaps the most practical gift on this list. It’s almost undeniable that every gal needs a great tote. If she’s in need of a new one, or hers doesn’t really live up to her own stunning appearance, this one from Hugo Boss could be just the gift for her. The black full-grain calfskin leather outer gives the bag a sleek, luxurious finish, which can be dressed up or down depending on the occasion. With the spacious interior this tote touts, your wonder woman can use this bag to carry around her laptop, pick up a few groceries with, or even pack a towel into for a day at the beach. We are all nothing if not one-dimensional under the great ability of the versatile tote bag.
Rimowa Sparkling Wine/Champagne Box
I’m just going to expect you’ve picked out a beautiful bottle of bubbly for the big night. Save James Bond’s Aston Martin DB5 from GoldenEye, I can’t really imagine a more stylish champagne carrier than this one by Rimowa. While it might not be able to drift down hairpinned, mountainside roads, it does share the same silver metal finish as Bond’s DB5, and keeps your sparkling beverage cool inside the insulated casing. This is one gift I’d definitely be tempted to steal back for myself.
Saint Laurent Monogram Chain Wallet
With whatever cash you two have leftover from this scam of a holiday, you can buy this monogrammed wallet from Saint Laurent. If your partner is one of those people who just can’t part with that ancient, hole-y wallet she’s had for ages, but has loads of sentimental value for, toss that thing straight into the garbage and gift her this supple, Italian-made upgrade. It’s elegant, organized, and should fit very well into any style of purse or bag she might have wanted you to get her instead.
Carolina Herrera Good Girl Eau de Parfum Spray
Although I have not personally had the pleasure of smelling Good Girl by fragrance brand Carolina Herrera, the reviews are quite positive from a large part of the customer base. The scent is described as light, flowery, and having a good longevity, so maybe consider giving Good Girl a try this year. The rather unique shape of the bottle is definitely an attention grabber — not too dissimilar from something you might find behind the bookshelf-hidden fragrance closet in the office of Anchorman’s Brian Fantana. Slow the film down and you may just see the GG golden stiletto heel poking out from behind Sex Panther (made with bits of real panther, so you know it’s good). Time to musk up.