Sorry, New York Times, Canada Has Always Been Cool

Peter Saltsman January 18, 2016

In yesterday’s paper, the New York Times ran a surprising (and surprisingly tentative) headline: “With the Rise of Justin Trudeau, Canada Is Suddenly…Hip?” The story, which appeared in the increasingly fatuous Styles section, posited a theory that, despite ostensible popular opinion, Canada isn’t a cultural backwater after all. What about Drake, the article exclaimed! Rachel McAdams just got nominated for an Oscar! Oh, and have you heard of this Xavier Dolan guy?! He knows Adele!

If nothing else, the Times story felt like the very worst kind of backhanded compliment, littered with semi-insulting stereotypes and the assertion that Canadians didn’t know what cool was before they elected a Vogue model as Prime Minister. (Never mind that the new guy’s dad, also Prime Minister, was one of the coolest cats of the ‘70s and ‘80s, dating Barbara Streisand, hanging out with John and Yoko, using four-letter words and looking damn good in a hunting jacket. Or that the article goes on to name check PET-era Canadians as evidence of Canada’s newfound coolness, including Joni Mitchell, Lorne Michaels and Gordon Lightfoot.)

The central problem of the article wasn’t just its lack of grace, its international ineptitude or its bizarre spotlighting of 17 completely arbitrary examples running the gamut from global superstar to complete unknown, most of whom haven’t lived at home in half a decade. No, the biggest problem was the article’s standing on Trudeau as some kind of cruel social synecdoche. What is our obsession, it’s worth asking, with equating a politician’s coolness with that of the nation he or she governs?

We will, all of us, admit that Trudeau is a step up on the coolness ladder from the Harper era — politics aside, no one can deny the embarrassing dadness of the former PM’s Beatles karaoke sessions.

But so what?

One thing we can say about Canada is that, despite the relative coolness or uncoolness of our politicians, they debate ideas. They get elected on beliefs. And they pander to the arbiters of taste and trends much less than their American counterparts.

Consider the ongoing US election — and in particular last night’s Democratic debate. There, we saw two candidates vying to succeed Barack Obama, a man who refers to himself (only half ironically) as “the cool President,” a remark he gave while being interviewed in a Corvette by Jerry Seinfeld, and who has probably earned the title. Hilary Clinton, until last week the presumptive frontrunner, might be the least cool person in politics. Sure, her husband played the sax, but she can’t crack a joke or act natural if she tried — and she’s trying. Just take a look at her cringe-worthy appearance on Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show. At least it seems less desperate than Bernie Sanders chumming up with the rapper Killer Mike. (Although Killer Mike would surely make the coolest VP candidate of all-time, and that’s after Joe “insta-gif” Biden.)

All of which is to say: didn’t we learn about being cool in grade school? The harder you try — and the more you look like you’re enjoying it — the less cool you’re ever going to be. All this desperation? It’s unbecoming.