Nobody Has a Clue Where Kawhi Leonard Will Sign, and It’s Driving Everyone Insane

The basketball world (and essentially all of Canada) is holding its collective breath waiting for current free agent Kawhi Leonard to decide which team he will sign with. And we’re out here turning several shades of purple, because buddy is taking his sweet-ass time. Still, that hasn’t stopped the rumour mill from churning out all manner of palpitation-inducing conjecture. Last night, a tweet by a self-proclaimed “Lakers Insider From Reddit” rattled NBA Twitter to the core, claiming that Kawhi had already decided to join Bron and Co. in L.A.

Why would so many people take the word of some anonymous dude who likely lives in his mom’s basement as gospel, you ask? Fantastic question. As many forum-dwellers pointed out, this RDAmbition guy accurately predicted that Al Horford would sign with the Philadelphia 76ers two weeks ago. Also, he may or may not be Lakers president Jeanie Buss’ nephew. Regardless, no actual credible source has run with the Kawhi-to-Lakers story since RDAmbition tweeted this out yesterday, so it’s probably safe to delete this literal nephew.

As of today, the official(ish) word on Kawhi’s decision is he’s made no decision at all. This, according to Cris Carter of FOX Sports — who’s consistently been among the most plugged-in media sources into Leonard’s camp. He also added that there’s no current hierarchy of which teams Leonard’s leaning toward.

Meanwhile, the Internet’s been running wild with a report by The Scoop reporter Mychael Anthony, who has 105 Twitter followers, and claims Leonard’s camp met with the Clippers and was extremely impressed by the wide variety of dipping sauces present.

Reading some of the comments in that thread will illuminate just how rapidly online rumours can spiral. Dipping sauces. People truly believe dipping sauces will impact Kawhi’s decision. Quick, someone tell Bobby Webster to run to the nearest Sobey’s and stock up on Compliments party dips.

Creamy garlic aside, the latest credible update comes from The Athletic’s Shams Charania, who reports that Leonard hasn’t met with any team yet. All he’s done, apparently, is set out a plan on how to approach free agency with his camp.

So, in other words, everybody is full of shit and nobody knows a damn thing about what this man is thinking. (ESPN’s First Take panel essentially confirmed this today.) Everything on the Internet is a big fat lie.

One thing we do know (or do we?) is that the Raptors will be the final team Leonard meets with before he chooses his destination. That meeting is reportedly supposed to happen today, but who’s to say if that’s even the case? Who knows what to believe anymore! Nothing has meaning! Can someone get Ja on the phone to make sense of all this? WHERE IS JA?! 

According to ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski — who, at the very least, is not a basement dweller — it might still be a while before Kawhi settles on anything.

“I’m told he has a willingness to play it out this week and take time to think,” Wojnarowski said on Get Up! “There’s a possibility there may not be a decision until later in the week.”

So, there you have it. Several more days of will-he-won’t-he purgatory. Several more says of clenching hard. If you need me, I’ll be losing sleep staring at the RealGM forum hitting F5 incessantly (which, if you must know, is how I spent the entire long weekend).