So, I took a girl on a first date to watch the election and, hoo-boy, that was awful. “This is the worst date I’ve ever been on,” I said sometime between Florida going red and Wolf Blitzer announcing Clinton trailed in Pennsylvania. She nodded, sullenly, before we started on about whatever backpacking trips we’d been on.
Then Trump, his tie dangling out over his crotch, went to the White House, and the KKK paraded through North Carolina, and swastikas were spray-painted in New York, and Leonard Cohen said “Screw this, I’m out of here.”
So, here, this is how I feel this week went. A stupid mall Santa parachuting out of the sky, crashing into a stupid parked hatchback. Like, what?