This $250 Million Mansion Is the Most Expensive House in America

Yang-Yi Goh January 19, 2017

Don’t you just hate it when you’ve got a spare quarter-billion dollars lying around that you don’t know what to do with? Me too, man, me too. There’s only so many superyachts and Batmobiles and small Eastern European nations one man can own, you know? Luckily for you, real estate developer Bruce Makowsky has devised the perfect solution for all that pesky pocket change of yours: this $250 million USD Bel Air mega-mansion, the priciest home listing in American history.

The newly-built 38,000-square-foot behemoth boasts four floors, 12 bedrooms, 21 bathrooms, three kitchens, and seven full-time staff. That is correct. This house comes with seven human beings. What a steal.

The sweeping infinity pool comes complete with a swim-up bar and 270-degree views of Los Angeles.

Oh, yeah, and peep that TV. Not too shabby.

There’s a custom floating staircase between the second and third floors that I assume can only be used by the love interests in Bond movies as they descend into a fancy party wearing a stunning haute couture gown and lock eyes seductively with 007.

Speaking of 007, homeboy is emblazoned across the back wall of the mansion’s automated-recliner-laden home theatre.

There’s also a four-lane bowling alley, complete with bowling shoes in every size that your guests will inevitably take home as a party favour.

Car guy? Not to worry, there’s something here for you, too: a run-of-the-mill, $30 million collection of classic automobiles and motorcycles.

When your kids are bugging the hell out of you, go ahead and lock ’em in this roomful of candy and foosball tables for a few hours…

…and then slip away to the private massage room to relieve your splitting headache.

The wine cellar is large enough to put the LCBO out of business.

And the art on the walls gives the MOMA a run for its money.

Ever wanted to throw a house party that looks exactly like the club scene in a Michael Mann movie? Now you can.

I know what you’ve been wondering this entire time: where the helicopter at doe? Parked right next to the home office, of course, silly.

So, yeah. This place is OK I guess. I’ll probably just spend my extra $250 million on, like, IDK, some new deodorant or something. Can’t ever have too much deodorant. You go ahead and cop this one.